Ladies and gentlemen, I have Good News. The Valparaiso Souzeks that you know and love are picking up and moving all the way to New England. Yesterday I accepted a position about an hour outside of New York City (furthering my life's goal of living just beyond the suburbs of every major city in the world) and put in my two weeks' notice at my current job. In a few weeks, we'll be watching the Midwest fade away in our rearview mirror as we approach the Appalachian woodlands that are the Northeast.
For all its shortcomings, I cannot say that Valparaiso has not been good to me over the past six (really?) years: I spent a great four years in college here and met most of my closest friends in the world, I met my beautiful wife here (well, the internet connection was in Valpo), I got my first job, we started a family here... but it is time to move on. The state of Indiana just isn't big enough for all of our lofty dreams so we're trading it in for everything the East Coast has to offer.
We are absolutely thrilled.June 26, 2004 | Comments (3)
The plan was to take off work today in the mid-afternoon and drive up to Milwaukee to catch the Brewers v. Mariners game, christened Paul Molitor Day because Molitor, one of my childhood idols and the current hitting coach for Seattle, would be honored for his many years as a Brewer and upcoming induction into the Hall of Fame. In addition, today is my brother's birthday so he and a whole group of family and friends were making the trip down from central Wisconsin.
In reality, things did not go exactly as planned. The trip to Milwaukee normally takes about three hours so I left before 3:30 in order to get through Chicago before rush hour and be at Miller Park in time for the 7:05 start. Unfortunately I-94 had a different idea. In addition to the Skyway (I-90) construction, whatever governing body in charge of planning roadwork in Illiana decided to work on 94 at the same time, effectively slowing every path between Northwest Indiana and Chicago to a crawl. By the time I saw the Sears Tower, I was in the midst of rush hour traffic. Three hours later, I was still in the north suburbs with two hours' drive left until Milwaukee (putting the total trip at an estimated five hours), which meant I would miss about half of the game. It was at this point that I decided to call the family to apologize and cut my losses by calling an end to my ill-fated trip.
To give you an idea of the kind of traffic I was sitting in on the way there, the return trip took an hour and fifteen minutes. So I've been in the car for four hours, the trip has cost about $25 in gas and incidentals, I've wasted a $15 ticket and missed my brother's birthday, not to mention a potentially great night, but at least it ends there, right? Well, I decided to turn on WTMJ on the way home to catch some of the game. As it turns out, the game started about forty-five minutes late because of an extended tribute to Molitor, so I would've missed much less than anticipated.
I'd like to blame many things for the disaster that was tonight (the state of Illinois highway system, the city of Chicago, the automobile culture of the United States, etc.) but I'm sure my own foolishness played a bigger part than I'd like to admit. At times like this, it's good to have some delicately peated friends to help you through.June 16, 2004
Just over three weeks ago, my brother Phil graduated from college. As you can imagine, the entire family was bursting with pride over his accomplishment and excited for him as he began this new chapter in his life. However in the time that has passed since then, some of our enthusiasm has faded. The problem, you see, is that with graduation comes moving away and in this case that means moving away from the Valparaiso Souzeks. While we're still happy for him and all that crap, we have come to realize that his graduation actually sucks for us. When Phil moved back home, he left a large hole in all of our lives.
So it is with reluctance that I announce that his previous position is now available. The following are only a few of the qualifications that the ideal candidate must possess:
You know what, I'm going to stop there. I think it's pretty obvious that there's only one man for the job.June 08, 2004 | Comments (1)